Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Let it go or let it fill

Today I had a tiny little epiphany of sorts. I was sitting down to lunch after being very busy all morning tidying and cleaning and shopping at the market. I have been getting ready for John's parents to come today and felt happy to have a special reason to get my house spic and span and smelling good and all of the flat surfaces sanitized and shiny. I have finally been getting over my two weeks of sickness, and I wanted everything to be homey and welcoming. 

As I finally sat down to my late lunch while Grant napped, I felt overwhelmed with a sense of joy and pride in my accomplishments. I hadn't done anything particularly amazing (not brain surgery anyway). I had swept and mopped, tidied and laundered. I had arranged things I hadn't gotten around to making nice yet. I cleaned bathrooms, scrubbed dishes. All the while I was still able to play with Grant when he needed a friend. I was able to read him books while snuggled with his favorite blanket and then lay him down peacefully for his nap. I realized that with all of this work I felt full--full of health, a sense of having done a good job, and a sense of contentment. I felt grateful.

Sometimes it is easy for me to feel full of other things. I let nagging feelings of anxiety, worry, disappointment, regret, anger, blues, and envy fill me up to overflowing and today I realized that when I let those things stay inside, I take up all of the room that all of the good things would like to occupy.

We are not rich (ha!) we are not always living up to the best we can do as parents, spouses, children, siblings. But we are trying and the fact is that we can choose what we let fill us. I am so glad today I let the good things fill my heart.

And on that note, here are some cell phone pictures of my house while it is super clean and homey.
It's a rental, but it is our's for now, and my family makes it feel like home.

 Maddy's room
 i like to get kid soaps for their bathroom
 dark teal blue that is growing on me
 these pictures are all jumbled up. the curtains i made for maddy out of thrift store sheets and pinned up because i'm frugal like that :)
 a quilt my momma made
 love maddy's sweet little bed
that free dresser i got from the side of the road that one time
my desk that i love

 got that lamp from the thrift for $4
 my bed, slouchy and cozy. love my handmade headboard still
 and the only curtains i wouldn't give to the people that bought our old house

 one corner of our living room. i gave up trying to look cute all of the time and just wanted grant to enjoy the space too so i put his train table down here
my imperfect slipcovers

another road side save. one of my favorite revamps ever
that lovely craigslist t.v. we got for a steal. everything in my home was some sort of great deal, but i like to think that what matters is that it is clean and cozy
kitchen sink with my milk bottles
love this extra storage area between the kitchen and front room
still haven't made the shelves pretty. probably won't. notice there isn't anything on the lower shelves. that two year old is veeeerrrrry curious
a place to sit and watch the cars go by

love pumpkins

notice the leaves we have collected on our walks home from the bus stop?
it looks pretty and tastes pretty too

made a morning beverage station. notice my father-in-law isn't mormon so I bought him some folgers. I didn't want to scare my mom and get her all worried about our eternal salvation or anything :)
my favorite little boy having fun while mom cleans.


Emily Foley said...

Your house is so pretty. You have a real talent or asking a house a home. I wish I had hat. You're so terrific.

Also, I think that extra storage area is called a butlers pantry. My sister had one in Houston. I want one!

val said...

lovely, lovely. love so many things about your cozy home. your red chairs, that blue rug, the milk bottles, the pumpkins strewn about, the curtains, our daughters same/same bedspread, all of your fun prints you have framed, your white shelves. can i come over for lunch sometime ;) ha!
loved your comment you made last night on my blog about my mad mopping skills. love when something catches me off guard and a real laugh comes out.
i love your comments. keep em coming.

Anne said...

SO jealous you have a window over your kitchen sink. Someday...Beautiful house!

jane said...

I was about blown away that you got the house totally spi n span, with your little helper! The house looks great! (not just for tidyness, but for living in.)

But the real beauty is in the people who inhabit it, and the Spirit that is felt here, because of you.

Terry really appreciates the coffee, on many levels. You

love and hugs :~)

Kelly said...

It's nice to have days where life actually feels good! Everything looks so cozy and nice. I like your decorations!

Missy said...

Love your house! Love the blue rug, all your dressers for storage and that blue rug. So lovely.