Friday, May 24, 2013

ramble ramble

Things on my mind:

1. Chik-Fil-A

2. what our kids need from us

3. do you or your spouse get your school aged kids ready?

4. cheap date ideas?

5. unemployment and underemployment is hard

Let me briefly explain each of those.

1. Chik-Fil-A. I took Grant to Chik-Fil-A today because I needed an excuse to get out of the house and Grant needed a playplace to hang with other little people. While Grant was playing I noticed a little girl wailing on the second level of the climb-up play structure and a stressed out mom trying to hold a baby while also attempting to coax/cajole/wiggle that little girl down. The mom's efforts were rewarded by the little girl then holding on even tighter to the play structure. I jumped out of my chair and offered to hold the baby just as the mom was looking for a place to safely set him down. She was SO grateful to me and my two seconds of holding her adorable little baby so she could get her little girl down. I could see the embarassment on her face both for how her daughter was acting, and for needing to accept my help. I don't know if she could tell that I meant it from the bottom of my toes to the top of my head when I told her, "It's okay. I was just barely in your same shoes with my two little kids. It's okay." But I really really hope she could tell that I was rooting her on. It was like watching myself from just a year and a half ago from the outside. Seeing the stress, the guilt, the tiredness, the too few arms to get things done. She kept thanking me afterwards, and all I could think was: I am SO glad she let me help her, and I think it's sorta sad that something so small (holding a baby for two seconds) seems so momentous these days, and lastly I wish I could have hugged her and said, "you're doing a great job, AND a great work. Don't give up!"

2. I read this article. It's titled, "The Top 10 Things Children Really Want Their Parents To Do With Them." It was a very affirming article for me to read because it is a conscious decision I make to stay home as much as possible with my kids. Some days I NEED to get out (see number 1) of the house to maintain my sanity, but for the most part I try to give my kids lots of time at home just to be together, and to play, and to even be bored occasionally (you may think I'm joking, but I believe the gift of boredom is a real gift. That's a whole post in and of itself).

3. In our house, John gets Maddy ready in the mornings and then takes her to school. He brings her to me to do her hair in the morning (He used to do her hair as well, until I couldn't take it anymore--Vidal Sassoon he is not). I had to beg him to wake me up to do her hair for weeks before he actually would do it because he loves to let me sleep in a little. I always feel slightly guilty about not being up and helping to get Maddy ready, but I think John loves that time with just the two of them. What do you do in your house?

4. We never go on dates because the main date that we end up doing is a movie date. When you combine a movie, a babysitter, some over-priced movie snacks, and occasionally dinner, you get a super expensive date. What sorts of cheap dates do you do? We went to a bookstore for one date and that was fun! Maybe frozen yogurt would be another good idea. What else you got for me??

5. I have a friend who's husband has a master's degree and is desperately searching for a better job and having a hard time. My sister and her husband have just finished many years of schooling and are having a hard time finding anything at all. It makes my heart heavy. I am always reminded of a quote I heard while training to be a Welfare missionary for my church. It was spoken by Gordon B. Hinckley over 40 years ago, he said,

 “A man out of work is of special moment to the Church because, deprived of his inheritance, he is on trial as Job was on trial—for his integrity. As days lengthen into weeks and months and even years of adversity, the hurt grows deeper . . . Continued economic dependence breaks him. . . . He is threatened with spiritual ruin. . . . The Church cannot hope to save a man on Sunday if during the week it is a complacent witness to the crucifixion of his soul.” 

We know personally the fear, anxiety, and feelings of worthlessness that accompany unemployment. We were so lucky to have family that helped us to carry our burdens during those hard times.  I am praying hard for my sister and my friend. 

Sorry to end on a sad note, but in a positive turn, it will be so nice to have a long weekend coming up! I plan to enjoy it by eating some watermelon and letting the kids squirt their dad with squirt guns all weekend long. :)
 and because i hate to have posts without pictures, here are some random photos from the week--here is one from the pond near our house that John took. I love these ducks and their ducklings. they are always crossing the street, all in a line just like in the book Make Way for Ducklings

 baby jazzercise
 you use the baby as your resistant weight
 muddle jumping is what i call this

 that was a fun laundry day

 time to gas up the cars
 oh, and I wanted to get your opinions. Someone left this on the curb with a free sign. You know that I can't pass up free furniture. it's a sickness. what should i do with it? paint it? (what color?) or sand and restain it? leave it alone and give it a stiff cleaning?

 i love the keyhole

 oh yeah, and sometimes your kids need to play with a glorified cardboard box. (note to self, putting this away for a few months post christmas was a GREAT idea).

cheese! now, that's a much better way to end.


Carrie said...

Looks like you found yourself cedar chest! Cool! I would paint it with the chalk paint....coco is my new favorite although you would probably like the grey colored paint :-)

Nice thoughts.... And I have Gordon dress the kids :-). lol

Carrie said...

Can you add some something so that it comes up on my Bloglovin feed?

Carrie said...

Disregard last just came up in my Bloglovin!

maugers said...

I do love those pictures :) I have no opinions on the trunk, but sanding and staining sounds much harder than painting... And for cheap date ideas? We like to try new things, one time we played pickleball at the rec-center with a bunch of old men (it was SO fun! and they thought we were amazing!). We love bike rides and walks, and we always look to Groupon for weird restaurants (we did Ethiopian the other night, not my fav). Oh, once we did a par 3 golf course, that was funny too. Now that it's summer cheap dates are a little easier.
AND, I'm SO excited to see you in a couple months! I'll let you know the dates we'll be there and when we could meet up! yipee!

Emily Foley said...

I will never forget climbing up in a McDonald's playplace after Isaac when I was 9 months pregnant with Noah and crying my eyes out afterwards. Sometimes it's so hard! Good for you for helping out! And man do I miss Chick-fil-A.

I get up and get the kids ready--well, they get up at 6 am so they're already up. 7:20 TV goes off and they have to get dressed and brush their teeth, out the door by 7:30. Sometimes I take them, sometimes Dave takes them now that he works in town and doesn't have to leave so early. I think he likes taking them because of the funny conversations in the car.

Bookstore dates are my favorite! Too bad we don't have a bookstore. I also like eating out so I can skip the movie for a good dinner out, or else doing a game night with friends is top of my list. We sometimes walk around downtown and look in the shops at the cowboy hats and boots. Fun. We used to switch off every other weekend with another couple so we had free baby-sitting and sometimes we would just come home and watch shows and eat ice cream. With no kids around it felt like a real date!

#5 is going to be a looong comment, sorry. When we lived in Utah I know my husband was really struggling with underemployment blues. We made less than $30k when we lived in Utah (supporting a family of 5!) and it simply wasn't enough. Not even close. We were living on support from my parents and WIC and the little I made at my Google job and it was a terrible feeling. Then we met with our bishop for something, maybe tithing settlement? and out of the blue he said to Dave "You are worth more than you are paid. Your wages do not determine your worth." And I burst into tears because it was exactly what he needed to hear. He had a masters degree and was making below poverty level income. So he expanded his job search and more than doubled his salary in our move to Gallup. Now we're stuck here because his profession doesn't pay well (it pays better here because it has to, nobody wants to move here) but it's done wonders for his self esteem (and our budget). No man wants to feel like he can't support his family. So I know how those poor folks feel and let them know that some day it will get better. And that their worth is NOT tied up in how much money they make, even if it feels that way sometimes.

Kelly said...

If it were me... I'd sand and stain the bottom then paint the top like the British flag then antique it! Then store my quilts in it!

val said...

oooh. love the chest you found for FREE! my husband speeds up when he sees me get a glimpse of something free on the road..but ser, free? i might try and restain it...although i think that requires more work than yeah, paint it? ;)